Included in this working thesis is a reason for the war and some idea of how the two sides disagreed over this reason. As you write the essay, you will probably begin to characterize these differences more precisely, and your working thesis may start to seem too vague. Maybe you decide that both sides fought for moral reasons, and that they just focused on different moral issues.
You end up revising the working thesis into a final thesis that really captures the argument in your paper: While both Northerners and Southerners believed they fought against tyranny and oppression, Northerners focused on the oppression of slaves while Southerners defended their own right to self-government. Compare this to the original weak thesis. This final thesis presents a way of interpreting evidence that illuminates the significance of the question. Keep in mind that this is one of many possible interpretations of the Civil War—it is not the one and only right answer to the question.
Why is this thesis weak? But the question did not ask you to summarize; it asked you to analyze. First, the question asks you to pick an aspect of the novel that you think is important to its structure or meaning—for example, the role of storytelling, the contrasting scenes between the shore and the river, or the relationships between adults and children.
Now you write: In Huckleberry Finn, Mark Twain develops a contrast between life on the river and life on the shore.
What does it signify? Eventually you will be able to clarify for yourself, and then for the reader, why this contrast matters. This final thesis statement presents an interpretation of a literary work based on an analysis of its content.
Of course, for the essay itself to be successful, you must now present evidence from the novel that will convince the reader of your interpretation. Works consulted We consulted these works while writing this handout. Please do not use this list as a model for the format of your own reference list, as it may not match the citation style you are using.
For guidance on formatting citations, please see the UNC Libraries citation tutorial. Anson, Chris M. The Longman Handbook for Writers and Readers. New York: Longman, Ruszkiewicz, John J.
The Scott, Foresman Handbook for Writers. Lunsford, Andrea A. Working thesis: Young people have to work hard to succeed in life. Revised thesis: Recent college graduates must have discipline and persistence in order to find and maintain a stable job in which they can use and be appreciated for their talents. The revised thesis makes a more specific statement about success and what it means to work hard.
The original includes too broad a range of people and does not define exactly what success entails. By replacing those general words like people and work hard, the writer can better focus his or her research and gain more direction in his or her writing. Clarify ideas that need explanation by asking yourself questions that narrow your thesis. Working thesis: The welfare system is a joke. Revised thesis: The welfare system keeps a socioeconomic class from gaining employment by alluring members of that class with unearned income, instead of programs to improve their education and skill sets.
A joke means many things to many people. Readers bring all sorts of backgrounds and perspectives to the reading process and would need clarification for a word so vague. This expression may also be too informal for the selected audience.
By asking questions, the writer can devise a more precise and appropriate explanation for joke. The writer should ask himself or herself questions similar to the 5WH questions. By incorporating the answers to these questions into a thesis statement, the writer more accurately defines his or her stance, which will better guide the writing of the essay.
Replace any linking verbs with action verbs. Linking verbs are forms of the verb to be, a verb that simply states that a situation exists.
Working thesis: Kansas City schoolteachers are not paid enough. Revised thesis: The Kansas City legislature cannot afford to pay its educators, resulting in job cuts and resignations in a district that sorely needs highly qualified and dedicated teachers. The linking verb in this working thesis statement is the word are. Linking verbs often make thesis statements weak because they do not express action. Rather, they connect words and phrases to the second half of the sentence.
The writer should ask himself or herself questions in order to replace the linking verb with an action verb, thus forming a stronger thesis statement, one that takes a more definitive stance on the issue: Who is not paying the teachers enough?
What is the problem? What are the results Omit any general claims that are hard to support. Many girls have strict parents, dress appropriately, and do not engage in sexual activity while in middle school and high school. The writer of this thesis should ask the following questions: Which teenage girls? Why are they behaving that way?
When you make a subjective judgment call, specify and justify your reasoning. Original thesis: Socialism is the best form of government for Kenya. Revised thesis: If the government takes over industry in Kenya, the industry will become more efficient. Avoid merely reporting a fact. Say more than what is already proven fact. Go further with your ideas. Otherwise… why would your point matter?
Original thesis: Hoover's administration was rocked by scandal. Revised thesis: The many scandals of Hoover's administration revealed basic problems with the Republican Party's nominating process.
Do not expect to come up with a fully formulated thesis statement before you have finished writing the paper. The thesis will inevitably change as you revise and develop your ideas—and that is ok! Start with a tentative thesis and revise as your paper develops.
Is your thesis statement original? Avoid, avoid, avoid generic arguments and formula statements. They work well to get a rough draft started, but will easily bore a reader. Keep revising until the thesis reflects your real ideas. Be prepared to explain why the point you are making is worthy of a paper. Why should the reader read it?
Compare the following: There are advantages and disadvantages to using statistics. In order to ensure accurate reporting, journalists must understand the real significance of the statistics they report. Because advertisers consciously and unconsciously manipulate data, every consumer should learn how to evaluate statistical claims.
Avoid formula and generic words. Search for concrete subjects and active verbs, revising as many "to be" verbs as possible.Forcefulness Confidence The societal and personal struggles of Troy Maxon in the play Fences symbolize the challenge of black males who lived through segregation and integration in the Vishwavani online paper writing States. Closing all American borders for a period of five years is one solution that will tackle illegal immigration. Compared to an absolute divorce, no-fault divorce is less expensive, promotes fairer settlements, and reflects a more realistic view of the causes for marital breakdown.
You find that you are interested in the amount of sugar Americans consume. You decide to explain what you mean about food and beverage choices, so you write: Experts estimate that half of elementary school children consume nine times the recommended daily allowance of sugar.
Use specific language. Superlatives like "the best" almost always lead to trouble. Writing at Work In your career you may have to write a project proposal that focuses on a particular problem in your company, such as reinforcing the tardiness policy. And by writing down your thesis you will be forced to think of it clearly, logically, and concisely. Exposing children from an early age to the dangers of drug abuse is a sure method of preventing future drug addicts. For example, "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe because of the ruling elite's inability to address the economic concerns of the people" is more powerful than "Communism collapsed due to societal discontent.